Enslaved by Ducks

i can really connect with this guy and identify with most of the issues he went through with his animals. hope there will be a sequel!

I volunteer at our local nature center, helping care for injured, sick, and orphaned wildlife. I'm also an animal lover at home, and of course, it all began with a rabbit...With every page I turn, I laugh and reflect on my own memories of the various creatures I've loved and invited into our family. (And the ones who found their way into our family, forced their way into our family!) This book is about how my life with critters has evolved. Though, animals were never really a matter of mutual approval in our house. I got all of this from my mother. My father seldom knew about the animals we brought home. And when he found out, boy was he mad. Eventually he gave up, knowing it was a losing battle. When he and my mom decided she could raise pheasant, she brought home nearly 90 chicks, and she snuck a pekin duckling into the mix. He asked her why that one looked funny. Oops, they must have mixed one in by mistake! Haha. I was the kid sneaking pets into the dorm room. I tried to keep within the rules to fish tank only creatures, but that didn't suit my animal full lifestyle back home. I managed to keep tree frogs, and even a rat for a while. Then I got married, and I made the rule that a dog or cat was a family decision, but anything else was fair game. I have a thing for rabbits. I acquired several after I conned my husband into buying a hundred year+ farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, mid-Michigan. I told him we had to have a dog by spring. By spring, we had three cats, four ducks, two turkey, five chickens, two rats, and three rabbits. The pup was actually a surprise from him later. And eventually, more chickens and even a guinea hen made their way here. More ducks found sanctuary here from the nature center. Sometimes people bring us domestics that we can't take care of there because we rehab wildlife only. Now that I'm divorced, it's all free-for-all! My two kids and I share our home with five ducks, two chickens (those pesky weasles are awfully sneaky), a guinea hen, a parakeet, a love bird, two cats, two dogs, and three rabbits. Oh, and a feral cat I managed to befriend after six years, who I leave food for and take to the vet for rabies shots as needed.I decided that I need to make this book a pre-req for any man who dares think he can come into my life and handle the funny farm, because this book pretty much hits the nail on the head of how things work around here. Right down to the elaborate burial markers. My kids love pet show and tell days, because they are the only ones who can bring in a duck bigger than the dog their classmate's parent carried in with a purse. This year was our first attempt at taking duckie to school, and she survived preschool! Anyone who "owns" a pet eventually learns that no matter how much in-control you are, they really are the ones ruling the roost. We plan vacations around them, either by paying through the nose for a pet sitter or boarding, or by just loading them all up and taking them with us. It's really something when you spend five minutes properly buckling in two kids and two dogs to go camping, and not only do the kids give you sibling troubles, but the pups fight over who gets to sit in the front seat. They are family through and through, giving you fond memories, grief, and making you just want to rip your hair out. It's a good thing they're cute! People always say that once you have kids, you say the darndest things like they're normal. The same is true with your furry and feathered family. And if you think your bird is chirping away and doing an amazing job of throwing her voice, check your smoke alarm; you probably need to change the battery.This is a great book to brighten your mood. It's an easy, light read. If I wasn't so tired at the end of the day from taking care of all these breathing beings, I might have been able to finish it the first night. Enjoy! I'm so happy someone at the nature center brought this as their secret Santa gift this year. I can't wait to read more from Mr. Tarte. It truly has been like reading my own journal.

Okay, I admit it. It's hard for me to give under four stars to a book that's well written. Sometimes I give four stars to a book that's not even that great because its heart is in a good place. The author (I'm assuming) goes through months and months of work, doing edits, getting feedback from friends/readers, and brings out the best product possible. I'm beginning to wonder about my rating system however.Bob Tarte displays a wonderful facility with words and the guy is flat-out funny at times, enough to make me laugh out loud. For example, in the midst of being pitifully perched on the very top of a unbalanced six-foot step ladder, trying to capture a runaway bird sitting on a limb just out of reach, Mr. Tarte looks down and notes the ladder's warning sign: Don't stand on the top step. "Why do they call the top level a step," he thinks splayed out in his convoluted Harold Lloyd position, "when it's not?" If this isn't funny to you, blame me. I'm not portraying the scene well. You'll have to take it on faith that it broke me up.Tarte's memory for detail is phenomenal and while I found this impressive, after a time, I found it trying. Enough already. The book seems to be about 1/3 too long and it just... ends. No real insight, no real change in... well, anything. I confess to skimming the last 30 pages or so.The author and his wife Linda obviously love animals, though it is also obvious that in their marriage Linda rules the roost. (Once, just once, I'd like for the author to win an argument over whether to take in a new pet.) Yes, Linda rules her husband, but it is their menagerie that runs their lives rather than the other way around. After a while, even though each animal's personality is painstakingly portrayed and their illnesses and deaths poignantly delineated -- the turkey blinding was especially moving, I thought -- everything began to run together by book's end. After a while, the text reads like a shampoo bottle: Shampoo, rinse, repeat. The reader can easily get the sense that these people, well-intentioned for sure, are in way over their heads.I see that Mr. Tarte has authored other similar books. I thank him for this one, but one is enough.

I rarely have time to read. Keeping my cookie business going takes up nearly all of my waking hours. But things slow down just a tad here in January and so I bought myself a Christmas present - a book I've been wanting to read for years. It was published in 2004. I see it often in mail order catalogs and it always gets rave reviews. People who have read it said they laughed right out loud. I needed a good laugh after the month of December when my dog Orielle was so sick and I had so many cookie orders to fill and so I purchased "Enslaved by Ducks" by Bob Tarte from amazon.com.It's a collection of stories of his misadventures with a whole menagerie of pets - from bunnies to cats to parrots to ducks to turkeys and a few run-ins with raccoons. As a person who can barely handle the care-taking of just one dog - I have to hand it to Bob and his wife Linda. They take on the most daunting of tasks even when it puts their own well-being in jeopardy.Bob writes much like I do - using hyperbole to make his point comically. And in many of his situations it's a good thing he can laugh about them. Others might be taking the bridge. And true to the reviews - I often found myself laughing right out loud even though I was alone - with only the dog staring at me as if I had lost my mind. I laughed so hard several times I had an asthma attack. When I was just 18 pages into the book I had to "ration" my reading. I didn't ever want this book to end. It was so funny and so informative and so enjoyable. I allowed myself only one chapter each day. This is a book I will keep to re-read - just as I re-read "Gone With the Wind" every couple of years.When I emailed the author to tell him how much I enjoyed "Enslaved by Ducks" he informed me that he has two others in a similar hysterical vein - "Foul Weather," and "Kitty Cornered." And he told me he is in the first stages of writing another book - this one about birding. I ordered the other two and eagerly anticipate the arrival of the third.You don't have to love animals and birds to appreciate Bob's books. But if you do, these will be an extra special treat. Anyone who likes to laugh, needs a laugh should buy "Enslaved By Ducks." Enslaved by DucksEnslaved by Ducks

This book is laugh out loud funny. Anybody who has ever had a pet will know exactly where Bob Tarte is coming from.